


Heartstrings

by Pokeluv101



Category: Servamp (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Human, Fluff, Given AU, M/M, Moments of Hurt and Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2021-01-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:09:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27879630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pokeluv101/pseuds/Pokeluv101
Summary: Kuro goes to take a nap in the staircase behind the school and sees Mahiru holding a broken guitar. After he helps him repair the guitar string, Mahiru asks him to teach him how to play. (Given AU/Band AU)
Relationships: Arisuin Misono/Sendagaya Tetsu, Hyde | Lawless/Licht Jekylland Todoroki, Kuro | Sleepy Ash/Shirota Mahiru
Comments: 3
Kudos: 32





	1. Chapter 1

“I need a nap.” Kuro muttered to himself as he dragged his feet down the hallway. He would stay after school even though he wasn’t a part of a club or sports. The trains would often be filled with people right after school ended and he didn’t feel comfortable around so many strangers. He wanted to avoid the crowded train by waiting an hour until he returned home.

In the back of the school, there was a staircase that people rarely used. The large window next to the stairs created a sunbeam and he liked to sleep on the steps after school. Kuro had fallen asleep in the spot without anyone finding him and he hoped that would continue. He lived with a large family so it was rare for him to have an hour of silence. He loved his siblings but he needed a moment alone sometimes.

Kuro opened the metal doors that led to the staircase and he was surprised to hear muffled voices. He hoped that it was merely students passing by and he could have the staircase to himself once they were gone. He walked around the rail and glanced up the steps. A brunette student sat in the sunlight with a light blue guitar. He vaguely recognized him since they sat next to each other in class.

He was alone and the voice he heard was from a tutorial video playing on the laptop in front of him. The brunette followed the video’s instruction and hesitantly placed his fingers over the string. After Kuro watched him for a few minutes, it was clear that he was teaching himself how to play the guitar. The chords sounded a little rough and hollow.

Kuro also played the guitar so he could tell that the brunette was a beginner. Then again, it would be difficult for even a professional guitarist to play on such worn strings. He watched the video with a determined expression. At a glance, Kuro thought that he would be the stubbornly troublesome type. He didn’t want to interrupt him so he turned around to leave.

The distinct sound of a guitar string snapping stopped him. He turned around and saw how the brunette was covering his cheek with his hand. Kuro could easily guess what happened. The brunette appeared to be more shocked than anything and his brown eyes reminded him of a doe. Before he could think better of it, Kuro walked up the steps to him.

“Are you okay?” Kuro asked.

“I… I’m fine but my guitar is broken. I don’t know how to replace the string so I’ll have to go to a music shop to repair it. Hopefully, there’s a shop close to the station.” Mahiru mused out loud. He hugged the guitar close to his chest as if he was afraid that it would break apart. While his voice was calm and even, Kuro saw a hint of panic in his brown eyes.

“Shouldn’t you be more worried about yourself than a guitar string? Your cheek is bleeding. I have a band-aid you can use.” Kuro sat next to him and placed his backpack on his lap. He rummaged through his messy bag and said, “I carry a lot with me because my little brothers play rough with each other and they’re always getting scrapes and cuts.”

“Thank you, but I don’t need a band-aid.” He reassured Kuro. The guitar string had struck his cheek when it snapped but it didn’t hurt. He thought it was kind of him to offer a band-aid though. “My name’s Mahiru Shirota. I think this is the first time I’ve ever heard you spoke even though we’re in the same class. You’re always sleeping.”

“I’m Kuro.” He introduced himself. He finally found a band-aid and handed it to Mahiru.

Kuro was confused when he didn’t take it from him. He pointed to his cheek and said, “I can’t see where I’m bleeding. Can you put this on for me?”

The mark on his cheek was small and the bleeding had already stopped. Nevertheless, he nodded. Kuro didn’t know why he would help with himself so small and inconsequential. As he peeled open the band-aid, Mahiru wiped away the dried blood from his face. He placed the napkin in his pocket and joked: “Does the injury look bad, Doctor?”

“You should survive but you’ll need to hold still so I can put this on you properly.” He found himself playing along with his joke. Kuro knelt in front of him and carefully placed the band-aid on his cheek. He was surprised by how soft his skin was. He knew that he shouldn’t be so close to him when they didn’t know each other well.

Kuro leaned back from him and Mahiru said: “Thank you, Kuro.”

“It’s nothing. I got a lot of practise treating my siblings’ wounds.” He said and his eyes fell onto his guitar. “Your strings look very old but the actual guitar is in good condition. I’m surprised you chose a vintage Gibson when you’re a beginner. This model came out twenty years ago. They’re pretty expensive too. You should learn how to properly maintain a guitar before you play. It’ll be troublesome if the string snaps again and it hits your eye.”

With the advice, Kuro stood to find a new place to sleep. He doubted he would be able to fall asleep with Mahiru practising in the staircase. A few items fell out of Kuro’s bag as he picked it up and Mahiru leaned down to help him collect his things. Mahiru laughed softly and said, “Your bag is a mess. No wonder you were having trouble finding bandaids in it.”

“You sound like my sister when you lecture me like that. Can’t deal. It’s faster to throw the things I need inside rather than organize it.” Kuro shrugged. Mahiru only smiled at him and there wasn’t a hint of judgement on his words. He was merely teasing him for being disorganized yet Kuro felt a little flustered. He couldn’t explain how his warm laugh made him feel.

“You might not be the best student but it sounds like you’re a great brother.” He smiled up at him softly. Mahiru held out a small package to Kuro. “These fell out of your bag. Oh, these are guitar strings! Do you have a guitar as well, Kuro? Is that why you knew so much about my guitar? Can you show me how to replace the guitar strings?”

Mahiru leaned closer to Kuro with each question and his large eyes pleaded with him to help him. They were so close that their legs brushed together. The only thing between them was his guitar. When Kuro didn’t answer him, he thought he would say no. His eagerness turned to disappointment and he worried that he made him uncomfortable by being so forward. His expression tugged at Kuro’s heart.

He sighed and held out his open hand to Mahiru. “I’ll restring your guitar.”

“Really? Thank you, Kuro!” Mahiru’s eyes beamed with happiness at his answer. He wore his emotions openly on his face and the trait was rare to find in the high school where most of the students wanted to fit in. He held out the guitar to him. “I’ll pay you back for the strings tomorrow.”

As he passed the guitar to him, Kuro noticed how his fingers were clutching onto the instrument. He had also reacted to a broken string as if the guitar had been shattered. The reaction was subtle but he saw it. The guitar was clearly important to him. Kuro placed the guitar on his lap and treated it like glass so Mahiru would be more comfortable.

“The strings I use are the standard thickness for electric guitars. You should use thinner strings since your hands are smaller and you’re still a beginner. Change the strings one at a time to keep the tension.” Kuro explained as he went through the motions of restringing the guitar. Mahiru sat close to him and watched his hands. He considered writing down the steps but he was memorized by Kuro.

Mahiru noted how his fingers had faded scars and he wondered if they were caused by playing the guitar. He was strong yet he was careful with the delicate instruments. His touch was also gentle when he put the band-aid on him. Kuro’s brows were drawn together in concentration. Bathed in the afternoon sun, Mahiru thought he was surprisingly handsome. They sat next to each other in class but this was the first time he spoke to him.

“That’s all of them.” Kuro said once he was finished. Mahiru was confused when he didn’t return his guitar immediately. Instead, he adjusted his hold on the instrument and positioned it on his lap. “You need to tune this thing each time it has new strings. Didn’t you research these things before you bought an expensive guitar?”

“This isn’t my guitar. I’m only borrowing it. There’s a song I want to play for someone. She… It’s a melody that has been stuck in my head for a while now. I need to learn how to play that song by the tenth of January.” The date was still months away but Mahiru was afraid he wouldn’t be able to learn the guitar by then. He began to hum the unfinished song to himself and he hoped to fill the awkward silence.

Unconsciously, Kuro began to play along with Mahiru’s song. He would occasionally stop to tune the guitar and match the notes better. Mahiru closed his eyes and his body swayed towards Kuro’s warmth. Their shoulders touched and his humming drifted into silence. At that moment, Kuro ran the pick over the strings and the single chord echoed through Mahiru’s body.

Neither of them knew how that one chord would connect them.

“Please, teach me how to play, Kuro!” Mahiru wrapped his hands around Kuro’s and looked into his red eyes. He was focused on the request and he didn’t realize how his own heart had quickened. He didn’t break his gaze with Kuro as he continued. “I don’t have money to pay for lessons but I can help you organize your bag or make lunch for you in exchange.”

“My bag is already organized by my standards.” Kuro didn’t have time to teach Mahiru how to play the guitar but he didn’t want to say no to him. He remembered his sad expression when the string broke. “I’ve never taught anyone to play before and I doubt I’ll be good at it. You can join the music club and the teacher will help you more than I can.”

“It has to be you though.” Mahiru said. He couldn’t describe why the single chord he played caused such a strong reaction in him. He had planned to teach himself through tutorial videos. After he heard Kuro play, he realized that it wasn’t enough to simply learn the motions of strumming. He wanted to play in a way his emotions would reach others.

“I would love to help but you’re better off asking someone else.” He said reluctantly and handed the guitar back to him. Their hands brushed together and Mahiru looked up at him. He held his gaze and he silently asked him to teach him. He almost changed his answer when he looked into his brown eyes. Kuro reminded himself that he didn’t have time to tutor someone and pulled away.

He slipped his backpack over his shoulder and walked down the stairs. Kuro didn’t want to see Mahiru’s disappointed expression. He started to open the door yet Mahiru’s voice stopped him.

“Kuro,” Mahiru called his name and jumped to his feet. He stood at the top of the staircase but Kuro could see the determination in his brown eyes. He held the blue guitar close to his chest as he declared: “I’m going to follow you to the ends of the earth until you agree to teach me how to play the guitar. Thinking simply, you should just agree right now. That would be less troublesome, right?”

“I was right, you’re the troublesome type.” Kuro muttered to himself. He turned back to Mahiru and said, “Good luck with that song you were humming. It sounds good so far. I hope you find someone to teach you how to play it on the guitar.”

He left the staircase and Mahiru was surrounded by silence once more.

Mahiru hadn’t truly listened to music since the summer he turned seven. That was when the strings in his heart had become tangled until music turned to a hushed hum. He never realized how much he missed something as prevalent as music. He refused to let it slip from his life once more.

* * *

“Please, teach me how to play, Kuro.” For a week, Kuro hadn’t been able to sleep in his favourite staircase. Mahiru would be waiting on the steps for him and repeat the request to him. He had to question why he didn’t find a new place to sleep since he knew they would be there during lunch. A few days had passed and Mahiru seemed to have changed his approach.

“Isn’t stalking a crime or something? Troublesome. Do you plan to follow me all across town?” He asked with a heavy sigh. After school, Mahiru decided to follow him. They walked down the street, side by side. Mahiru told him that he couldn’t afford a music teacher yet it was strange that he was so fixated on him. “You borrowed that guitar so you should ask that person for lessons. Maybe your parents can give you money too.”

Next to him, Mahiru paused and he stopped walking. His gaze fell to the ground but Kuro caught the hint of sadness they held. Did he say something strange? Kuro wasn’t the best with words and he doubted he could ask Mahiru about his lonely expression. He was confused when Mahiru faced him once again. He wore a smile that didn’t quite reach his brown eyes.

“My uncle adopted me and it has been just us for a long time.” Mahiru didn’t explain his family situation any further. “You might call me prideful but I can’t ask him to pay for music lessons. I’m thankful for everything he has already given me. I don’t want to burden him for something that’s a selfish whim. The owner of this guitar… It’ll be difficult to ask her to teach me.”

Kuro didn’t know how to reply to him. Mahiru must’ve read his thoughts because he quickly changed the subject. “I saw that you’re carrying a guitar case with you today. You must be taking it to a guitar shop or a class. Even if you don’t teach me, I might learn something by watching you play. That’s the reason I decided to follow you today.”

“I’m on my way to practise with my band.” He told him and pointed to a music shop across the street. “We have to meet every Friday since some of the band members are from different high schools. Hyde will whine if I’m late again.”

“You’re in a band? I’m surprised. Oh, that was rude to say. Sorry.” He apologized and covered his mouth. He was glad that Kuro didn’t appear to be offended by his words. Mahiru had heard rumours of how distant Kuro was with the other students. “I don’t want to get in your way if your band is practising for a show. But tomorrow, I’ll be waiting in our staircase for your first lesson. Bye, Kuro.”

He turned around but then he felt Kuro take his hand. He felt guilty that he might’ve made him remember something painful. Kuro thought of what he could do to make him smile again. “Mahiru, if you’re not busy, you can watch our practise. The others shouldn’t mind.”

“I think this is the first time you called me by my name.” He didn’t know why that made him smile softly. Mahiru accepted his offer to watch them practise with an eager nod. Kuro gestured for him to follow as he started to cross the street. He tried to let go of Mahiru’s hand and he was confused when his grip tightened. “The light is red. You shouldn’t cross when it’s red.”

“There aren’t any cars on the street.” He pointed out yet Mahiru shook his head slowly. Only after the light switched to green, did he let go. They crossed the street and Kuro watched Mahiru in the corner of his eyes. He had a light grip on his guitar bag. Kuro was distracted and he almost walked into the glass wall of the music shop. He quickly stopped himself and he hoped that Mahiru didn’t think he was strange.

They entered the music shop and Kuro briefly waved to the cashier. Since he didn’t need to introduce himself, Mahiru reasoned that they knew each other well. He followed him to a small studio room in the back of the shop and he peered through the window. He could see that there were already several people inside. Mahiru was interested in what kind of band Kuro had.

Kuro opened the door and called out to the band members. “Hey. Sorry that I’m a little late for practise. I actually have an excuse this time.”

“Did Neko-san pick up another stray cat?” Licht was surprised when he saw Kuro enter the studio with a person he didn’t know. Due to how quiet and introverted Kuro was, it was strange to find him with someone outside of his small friend group. His eyes fell onto the guitar case Mahiru wore. “Are you here to join our band? It is required for you to be an angel to join so be prepared to prove yourself.”

“I’m in the band. Does that mean you think of me as an angel too, Lichtan?” Hyde asked and threw his arm around Licht’s shoulder.

“The only reason I let a demon like you join is because Neko-san is worth two angels!” He yelled and kicked him away. Before either of them could cause a mess with a fight, a blond man came between them and held them apart. “Don’t try to defend him, Tetsu.”

“You two are troublesome. Mahiru isn’t here to join the band. He doesn’t even know how to play an instrument. Even if he was here to join, your intensity would’ve scared him away.” Kuro corrected him. He grabbed a free chair and moved it to stand against the wall. “You can sit here, Mahiru. I hope you guys don’t mind. He asked to listen to us play and I said he could come.”

“That’s interesting.” Hyde mused to himself. His brother had never brought someone to watch them practise before. He stepped in front of Mahiru and leaned down to peer closer at him. He couldn’t see anything special about him though. “My name’s Hyde and Kuro’s my brother. You’re wearing the same uniform as him. Are you guys classmates? Something more?”

“We’re in the same class. You don’t need to interrogate him, Hyde.” Kuro saw how Mahiru became uncomfortable with how close Hyde studied him. He lightly pushed on his brother’s shoulder to create more space between them. “Your time abroad in Europe made you forget your manners. Introduced everyone properly to him.”

“I hate when you lecture me like this, Nii-san.” He pouted at him but he nodded. Hyde stepped back and held out his arms. “I’m the one and only bass player in the band, Hyde Lawless Servamp. This angel over here is Licht Jekylland Todoroki and he plays the electric piano. You probably already know that Nii-san plays the guitar. Finally, here’s Tetsu Sendagaya on the drums. Together, the four of us are ‘The One and only’!”

“When did we agree to that name? I thought we haven’t decided an official name for us yet.” Tetsu tilted his head in confusion. “Also, you forgot our fifth member. Chibi is our manager. He isn’t here today because he has a doctor appointment.”

“You guys must be serious about music if you’ve hired a manager.” Mahiru said. The way Tetsu casually addressed their manager was strange to him. He thought they should be more respectful to a professional manager. He took off his guitar so he could sit down on the chair. He didn’t want to place the delicate instrument on the ground so he hugged it on his lap. “Thank you for letting me crash your rehearsal.”

While the others spoke with Mahiru, Kuro took out his guitar from its bag. He set up the equipment and then stood with his guitar. Kuro stood and strummed his guitar to test the settings on the equipment. His action drew Mahiru’s attention and he could feel him staring at him. When he turned to him, Mahiru quickly avoided his gaze. There was a hint of a blush on his face.

The expression was surprisingly endearing to Kuro. “You came to listen to us play. Do you have any requests, Mahiru? We’re an instrumental band but we can do covers of most songs.”

He didn’t know what he should request and simply said: “Something cool!”

“For something cool, we should play _Knocking on the Future_ with Nii-san's guitar solo intro!” Hyde suggested and pushed him forward. It was rare that they had an audience to watch them but he was more persistent than usual.

Kuro stood in the center of the room and rolled a string between his fingers. He didn’t know why he suddenly felt nervous to play in front of someone. He never saw the guitar as anything more than a hobby. The only reason joined the band was because his brother asked him to. Mahiru’s eyes shone with excitement and those honest feelings drew Kuro to him.

He took a deep breath and began to play the song.

Many people would compare their feelings to guitar strings with the phase ‘heartstring’. Mahiru never fully understood why and he assumed it was a simple link between music and love. Then, he heard Kuro play the guitar. He could feel thin strings run across his chest like they would a guitar. Those strings were drawn tight until they threatened to snap. Yet, if someone touched those heartstrings gently and carefully, Mahiru would hear music.


	2. Chapter 2

“I appreciate your offer to walk me home but you really don’t need to. My apartment is only a few blocks from the music shop.” Mahiru told Kuro as they walked down the street. He had become so engrossed in the band’s music that he hadn’t realized how late it was until the sun had already set. While it was polite to walk someone to their house, they were both guys. He wondered if Kuro’s offer meant that he was beginning to see him as a friend. With that thought, he asked: “Can you teach me how to play, please?”

“You must be the most stubborn person I’ve ever met.” Kuro said but a small chuckle followed his words. In the corner of his eyes, Mahiru saw him smile. He hadn’t seen him smile before because he would often have a relaxed appearance. The only time he saw him with a different expression was when he played the guitar. He recalled the concentration on Kuro’s face and it was surprisingly alluring.

Kuro rubbed his hands together and then placed them in his pockets to keep them warm. The night was cold in October and he glanced at Mahiru’s hands. He didn’t wear gloves to ward off the cold yet he held onto his guitar bag’s strap rather than using his pockets. It was clear that the instrument was important to him. Mahiru mentioned that he needed to learn before January came and he wondered why. He didn’t voice the question though. “The music club is free and it’ll probably be more fun than me.”

“I can’t explain my reason well. Even if I did, you might think I’m strange and silly.” Mahiru told him and laughed at himself. He tilted his head back to gaze at the stars above them. “Simply put, I was able to hear your emotions when you played. I could never do something like that. There’s someone I want to communicate my feelings to but I can’t put it into words. Music can be a good alternative though.”

“Are you sure you were hearing my thoughts when I played the guitar? You might have a superpower that lets you read minds.” Kuro joked. He adjusted his guitar bag on his back and said, “I don’t know if I can teach you something complicated like musical expression and such. A professional with more experience can help you better than me. I don’t have a strong connection to my guitar. The only reason I joined the band was because my brother asked me for a favour. The band needed a guitarist.”

His words surprised Mahiru. During the rehearsal, Kuro seemed to enjoy playing. He had the guitar before the band was formed as well. He wasn’t the type to start a hobby if he thought it was troublesome. They only met recently so he couldn’t pry into his connection to music. Mahiru had his own complicated reasons he wanted to learn the guitar.

Silence stretched between them and Mahiru unconsciously began to hum to fill the silence between them. Kuro recognized the song as the one he sang when they first met. He had never heard the melody before and he was curious about the full song. Mahiru stopped humming to ask: “Can I watch your band practise again? It was fun watching you guys play.”

“I don’t mind and the others were excited to have an audience.” He shrugged. “We’ve only played for a few small venues so far. We formed about a month ago so our band is pretty unknown. It doesn’t even have a name yet. We haven’t been able to decide on one. You heard the long name Hyde used to introduce us. Well, the ideas Licht had were more outlandish. Oh, I just remembered. I should tell the Shrimp if you’re going to watch us practise again.”

“Shrimp? Do you mean your manager?” Mahiru asked and Kuro nodded. “Tetsu also called him ‘Shorty’. It’s not very polite to call him those nicknames when you’re younger than him. You two might be tall for high school students but you can’t call other people short.”

“Actually, our manager is in high school like us. Except, he goes to the same high school as Licht. Those two were the ones who started the band actually. Tetsu was recruited next and then Hyde begged them to be a part of the band. I was the last to join.” Kuro explained. He looked down at Mahiru and a light shone over him. He quickly took his hand and pulled him closer. “Watch out for that car.”

Mahiru had been focused on Kuro and he hadn’t noticed the car approaching them. He quickly tried to avoid the car but he stumbled in his rush. He managed to catch himself before he fell by placing his hands onto Kuro’s shoulders. The car passed yet Mahiru didn’t pull away immediately. He knew Kuro was tall but it became more apparent when they were standing so close.

“You should be careful of cars.” His words pulled Mahiru out of his musing. Kuro thought he felt him stiffen a little but he didn’t know why his comment would affect him.

“I can’t see behind me.” Mahiru saw his red eyes fill with concern and he didn’t want the moment to become awkward. He forced himself to smile and added: “Thanks for the rescue, Kuro. This is my apartment building so I should thank you for walking me home too. I had a great time with you today, Kuro. I’ll see you Monday at our usual spot?”

“Sure.” He nodded and his answer made Mahiru smile brightly. He waved to him one final time before he walked into the building. Kuro stood outside and wondered when his ‘napping spot’ on the staircase became ‘their spot’.

* * *

Most of the band had returned home but Tetsu stayed behind in the music shop. He worked part time in the store and he helped move the heavy instruments into the backroom for storage. The building was filled with the song of a cello and it relaxed him. Tetsu walked to the front desk where a student was playing the cello. “What song is that, Chibi?”

“I thought I told you to call me by my actual name instead of that nickname. Repeat after me: Misono.” He insisted. Misono fingers never paused over the strings as he chastised him for using the nickname. His brother owned the music shop and he had hired Tetsu recently. He wanted to be Tetsu’s friend so he asked him to join his band after he saw him play the drums.

“I recorded the band’s practise on my laptop. The audio’s rough but you should be able to give us notes on the performance. I’ll send it to you later tonight.” He told him. In reply, Misono merely nodded and continued to practise the cello. Tetsu didn’t mind because he loved to watch him play. The instrument was larger than him yet he had a commanding presence with it. Misono’s music was regal and refined. Their instruments and styles were different but Tetsu had immense respect for Misono.

“I talked to a photographer who will take promo shots of the band. His price is good too.” He had started the band with Licht but he took on the role of manager after the others joined. Misono felt disappointed that he couldn’t contribute his skill as a cellist. “The four of you have been practising the same few songs and you’ve perfected them already. Did anything happen at the rehearsal?”

“Kuro brought his friend to listen to us play. I think his name was Mahiru.”

Misono’s bow slid over the strings incorrectly and it created a harsh shriek. He dropped the bow and Tetsu bent down to pick it up for him. He was slightly confused by his reaction to the name and he wondered if they knew each other. Mahiru wore a different uniform from him so it was unlikely they knew each other from school. “Should we not have let him join?”

There was a moment of silence before Misono took the bow he held out to him. He started to play another song to give himself time to gather his thoughts. “Mahiru and I were childhood friends. After his mother died, he moved to live with his uncle and we lost touch. I know it was more than the distance that made us stop being friends. He broke contact with everyone because he wanted to avoid his memories from that night. Even at the age of seven, I understood that.”

“You must miss him.” Tetsu whispered. He could hear Misono’s feelings in his voice and the melancholy of his instrument. He didn’t know why his stomach turned with jealousy but he tried to push the moment aside. “Mahiru might come to our next practise. You can see him again.”

“I’m surprised that Mahiru came to hear that he came to listen to the band at all. Ever since the accident, music has been a complicated subject to him.” Misono remembered the last time they spoke. “He can’t listen to music without feeling sad. Music is everywhere though— When you enter the supermarket or watch a movie. That must be painful for him. He was my best friend and I want to help him move on. I started a band to help him.”

“You formed this band for him?” Tetsu knew that he started the band with Licht but he never told him the reason.

“It was actually Licht’s idea. I told him about Mahiru and he said he was an angel who needed to be saved. If he could hear something that reconnects him to music, he won’t be sad each time a song plays.” Misono pressed his fingers against the strings of his cello. “We started as a classical duet but a modern band would reach Mahiru easier. I wish I could do something to help him.”

“You’re an important part of this band, Misono.” Tetsu placed his hand over Misono’s. His hand was much smaller than him but they held a surprising strength. He only intended to encourage him but then their gaze met. “Mahiru is very important to you?”

“Well, he was my first friend.” He told him. Misono noticed how Tetsu turned away from him so he couldn’t see his expression. He realized that he must’ve misinterpreted his words and he quickly tried to correct him. “Mahiru and I are just friends and there’s nothing romantic between us. I didn’t have many friends outside of my family staff and that’s the reason he’s important to me.”

“I still don’t know how you’re not more popular. You’re smart and cute.” His straightforward compliment caused Misono to blush deeply. He didn’t know how he was able to say those things so casually.

“Hey, why are you holding my brother’s hand!” Mikuni suddenly came between them and shoved Tetsu away. “I should fire you for hitting on Misono. You’re lucky you still have to repay me for breaking that drum set or I would’ve kicked you out ages ago!”

“Dear Lord.” Misono sighed at his brother’s protective behaviour.

* * *

“Can’t Eisuke find someone else to take over his shift? This is very last minute. I’m already scheduled to work the nightshift too. Troublesome.” Kuro told his brother over the phone. He checked the time and said, “I’ll head to the station in a few minutes, Hyde. There’s someone I have to talk to first. I should be able to make it to work on time though.”

“I’ll take your shift tomorrow so you can sleep all day.” Hyde offered. They had a large family so they needed to work at an early age to provide for their younger siblings. They also worked part time as waiters to buy equipment for their band. He was grateful that Misono’s brother owned a music shop so they didn’t need to rent studio space to practise.

Hyde was waiting at the train station for him and Kuro knew how impatient he was. Yet, the conversation he had with Mahiru replayed in his mind. He said they would meet on Monday and he didn’t want to break the promise to him. Someone as stubborn and trusting as Mahiru would likely wait for hours. Kuro would feel guilty if he made Mahiru sit in the staircase alone.

He couldn’t stay long but he thought he should tell him that he had to work. Kuro reached the staircase and he used his shoulder to push the door open. He could easily picture him sitting on the steps with his blue Gibson guitar. His first greeting would likely be: ‘Please, teach me how to play the guitar.’

The staircase was empty when Kuro entered it.

“He’s not here.” He whispered to himself and his voice echoed up the stairs. Kuro wondered if Mahiru had decided to go to the music club like he had suggested. He thought he would be happy to have his napping spot back. Instead, he felt disappointed and he found himself climbing up the steps. He glanced out the large window to the schoolyard below.

“Are you talking about that guy you brought to our practise?” Hyde asked over the phone and pulled Kuro out of his thoughts. His brother knew him well so he didn’t respond to him. He couldn’t understand his own reaction to an empty staircase and he was afraid to give his own feelings a name. “Did you have a date with him? You can just text him to cancel.”

“We’re not dating, Hyde. I would barely call us friends. He only follows me around because he wants me to teach him how to play the guitar.” Kuro descended the stairs to leave. “I’m on my way to the station so save me a seat.”

“Why don’t you teach him? I think it’ll be good for you.” Kuro was surprised that Hyde would encourage him to give Mahiru lessons. He knew how busy they were with school, their band and working part time jobs. “Last Friday’s session, you were more energetic than usual. The only difference between that practise and our past ones is that Mahiru was there.”

“Are you sure? It felt the same to me.” Kuro tried to brush Hyde’s words aside but he had to admit that there was a hint of truth in them. He placed his hand on the door to leave but something caught his eyes and made him pause. His brother went on to say, “It has been a long time since I heard you play the guitar so earnestly. You used to play it every night. Now, it’s only with the band.”

He didn’t respond because his focus was on a note taped to the door. _Kuro, I hope you find this letter. It’s me, Mahiru. I wanted to see you today but my friend, Mafuyu, asked me to join the soccer team with him at the last minute. I’ll see you tomorrow. Please, bring this note and circle an answer below. Will you teach me how to play? ‘Yes’ or ‘I’ll think about it’_

The ending of the letter made him smile and he circled the latter answer. “I’ll think about it.”

“Why do I feel like you’re not listening to me?” Hyde asked through the phone. “Hurry up the station or we’ll both be late for work.”

* * *

Mahiru laid on his back and counted the tiles on the roof. His gaze would move from the roof to the large window and then end on the door. His guitar laid heavy on his chest and he absentmindedly plucked on a string. He waited on the staircase for Kuro and he hoped that he found his note on Monday. He enjoyed playing soccer with his friends but he needed to learn how to play the guitar quickly. Once January passed, he would lose his courage to hold the guitar.

A paper airplane entered his vision and he reached up to catch it with one hand. He kept a secure hold on his guitar so it wouldn’t slip off him as he moved. Mahiru noticed writing on the airplane and he sat up so he could unfold it. He recognized the message as his own and the sentence ‘I’ll think about it’ was circled. Mahiru glanced up to search for Kuro. Kuro walked down the steps and he settled himself onto the floor next to Mahiru.

“I’m glad that you got my letter. I was the one who asked you to meet me here but I had to cancel at the last minute. Makuyu can be spacey and I worry about him playing a sport. He might get hit by a ball while he’s distracted. At least he has Uenoyama now and he would never let anything happen to him.” Mahiru told him. He held up the note and asked, “Do you want to trade phone numbers? It’ll be a better way to keep in contact than using letters and paper airplanes.”

“Promise you won’t text me every few hours for guitar lessons?” Kuro joked dryly but he took out his phone to exchange numbers.

“I swear. Have you thought about my request?” He asked hopefully and Kuro almost agreed when he looked into his eyes.

“I’m still thinking it over.” Kuro reached over and tousled Mahiru’s brown hair as he would with his siblings. He was surprised by how soft his hair was and he languidly twirled a few locks around his fingers. A soft gasp escaped Mahiru and Kuro realized how close they were. He quickly moved away from him and sat back against the wall. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay, Kuro. My hair is messed up but I don’t think that’s anything to apologize over.” He brushed his hair back into place and his fingers lingered over the spot Kuro stroked his hair. He could still feel the warmth from Kuro’s hand. Mahiru was surprised by his touch yet it didn’t bother him. He couldn’t describe how the simple gesture affected him. The strings around his heart loosened and vibrated to a soft note.

Kuro stared at the ground and he hoped that he hadn’t made Mahiru uncomfortable. He turned his head slightly to see Mahiru’s ace and there was a faint blush on his cheeks. After a moment, Mahiru slid closer to him and leaned into him so their eyes met. “There’s something I want to show you, Kuro. It might convince you to teach me how to play the guitar.”

He wore a confident smile as he sat up and positioned himself to play the guitar. Mahiru pressed his fingers on the strings lightly and then he played a simple chord. The note travelled throughout the staircase. He strummed the same chord and said, “This is the chord that you played after you tuned the guitar the day we met. I learned it when I visited the music club at lunch. I thought I should give it a try at least. They also taught me the proper way to hold the guitar and a play a few other chords.”

“You have a good ear for music if you’re able to recreate that chord after only hearing it once.” Kuro was impressed that Mahiru managed to learn the basics over lunch. He thought of how he would ask him to teach him each day. The passion and determination he had likely helped him learn faster. “It’s good that you found someone to give you lessons.”

“Everyone in the club was kind and helpful.” Mahiru said yet he shook his head slowly. “I don’t think I’ll join though. Thinking simply, I had a lot more fun listening to you play with your band. I want to play like that. Will you teach me?”

Mahiru was a mystery to Kuro. He stared at the Gibson guitar he held and he thought of how strange it was. He told him that he borrowed it yet a guitarist would never give such an expensive instrument to a high school student. Kuro believed Mahiru but could sense that there was more behind the instrument. Behind Mahiru’s request, he could hear him cry for something different. He didn’t know what it could be though.

A part of Kuro questioned why he was thinking about Mahiru so deeply. He rarely became involved with others. When he didn’t answer, Mahiru’s hopeful smile faded into a frown. He stopped strumming and his humming replaced the music. Kuro recognized the song since Mahiru had hummed it twice before. “What’s that song you’re always humming? It sounds nice.”

“Was I humming?” His brown eyes widened and he appeared truly confused. Kuro realized that he must’ve hummed the song unconsciously. Mahiru hugged the guitar close against his chest and said, “There has been a song stuck in my head. It doesn’t have a title or lyrics yet. The only thing I can sing is the la-la-la version of it.”

Mahiru closed his eyes and allowed the melody to flow out of him. He sang softly and it made him feel lighter. His voice harmonized with the strings playing in Kuro’s heart and the atmosphere around them began to tremble. He was entranced by him and he watched him sing. The song was brief yet it affected him strongly. He could feel his heart racing in his chest.

“The song is simple, isn’t it?” Mahiru turned to see Kuro’s reaction. He couldn’t read the expression he had and he seemed to be stiff with shock. He slowly moved closer to him and said his name, “Kuro?”

“I…” He sounded a little breathless. Then, he reached out to take Mahiru’s hand. “Your voice is beautiful. Our band needs a vocalist. Will you join? I’ll teach you how to play the guitar in exchange.”


	3. Chapter 3

“Are you okay, Kuro? You seem distracted.” Hyde asked his brother. Due to Kuro’s personality, others wouldn’t question why he was silent throughout most of their rehearsal. He could sense that there was something on his brother’s mind though. Kuro didn’t immediately answer him so Hyde thought he could teasingly joke with him. “Did you get rejected by someone?”

“Something like that.” He didn’t take his eyes off his guitar as he absentmindedly answered Hyde. Kuro played a few random notes and tried to match them to the song he would often hear Mahiru hum. After he listened to him sing in the staircase, he asked him if he wanted to join his band. They needed a vocalist and his alluring voice would fit their sound well.

He hadn’t expected him to say no. He thought of how persistent and passionate Mahiru was whenever he asked him how to play the guitar. Kuro assumed that he was interested in music. He was more surprised by the rejection he felt by his answer. He only joined the band as a favour for his brother but he didn’t care about success. Something about Mahiru’s song struck him though.

He wondered if he would see him in the staircase on Monday. What would he say if he was there? The first day he met Mahiru in the staircase, Kuro was disappointed that he couldn’t sleep in his hiding place. He found himself looking forward to their short meetings now. He wanted to know more about Mahiru and to hear the song he constantly hummed.

“Nii-san!” Hyde’s voice overpowered his guitar and pulled Kuro out of his thoughts. He stood behind Kuro and shook his shoulders. “I’ve been calling your name for the last five minutes but you wouldn’t answer me! I thought Tetsu was the one with his head constantly in the clouds. Oh, never mind that. You said you were rejected! By who? I didn’t know you were interested in someone. Tell me who.”

“Shut up, Shit Rat. I can’t hear my piano when you’re yelling like that. This is supposed to be a rehearsal so gossip after we’re done.” Licht kicked Hyde to stop him from bombarding him with more questions. Admittedly, he was also a little curious about who Kuro had confessed to. He had joined the band only a month before but he saw how he acted uninterested towards most things.

When Hyde first asked if they could join the band, Licht was against it. The brothers were clearly talented but they played half-heartedly. He started the band because Misono told him about his childhood friend and he wanted to help him reconnect to music. Such half-hearted feelings wouldn’t reach his friend. In the end, Misono invited them to join the band and Licht could only accept his decision.

“I didn’t ask anyone on a date. I only asked Mahiru to become our vocalist.” He insisted. He was being truthful but a part of Kuro felt as if there was something he was hiding from his brother. Pushing aside the confusing feeling, he added: “Mahiru sang a little bit for me and his voice was beautiful. He’s always asking me about music so I thought I would be interested in joining. He said no.”

“Is this the Mahiru that Tetsu told me about? He watched your rehearsal last week.” Misono hadn’t spoken with his friend since he moved to a new school. Despite how often Mahiru helped him when they were children, he wasn’t able to do the same for him. He held the guilt for years but he told himself that he would face him again after he created a band.

When Tetsu told him that Mahiru watched their band and how he wanted to learn how to play the guitar. He thought that he might’ve moved on. Yet, it was clearly more complicated. Music was important to Mahiru and Misono didn’t want to see him give it up.

“Big Brother Neko, this article might help you. I searched up what you should do.” Tetsu held out his phone to Kuro so he could read the screen. He read the title and his face became bright red.

“This is an article about how to ask out a girl after she rejects you. I said that isn’t what happened at all. Can’t deal.” Kuro pushed the phone back into Tetsu’s hand. He doubted the tall student had intended to tease him with the article but he couldn’t stop himself from bushing. He didn’t understand why he would feel so flustered over the misunderstanding.

“Maybe you should actually take the article’s advice and ask Mahiru on another date to see our band. I want to hear him sing.” His brother was an introvert and he didn’t have a lot of friends. Hyde was curious about Mahiru and what made his brother interested in him. He appeared to be a simple student when they met at the rehearsal last week.

“You give terrible dating advice, Shit Rat. Mahiru will think Kuro’s annoying if he keeps asking him out even though he already said no. I don’t know how you’re able to find a new girlfriend each week.” Licht rolled his eyes at the brothers. “You’re half-hearted with romance, music and school. Is there anything that you’re actually interested in?”

A devilish smile spread across Hyde’s face and he winked at him. He didn’t say a single word and that irritated Licht more than any answer he could give. He jumped to his feet and his hand slammed on his electric keyboard harder than he intended. A cluster of angry notes echoed around the room. The sound reminded Licht that he shouldn’t fight Hyde with so many delicate instruments around them.

“I’m going to the bathroom.” Licht said and walked out of the studio room. The others could see that he was angry and they thought it would be pointless to talk to him before he calmed down. The only one who chased after him was Hyde.

Kuro watched them leave and shook his head. While the two would often argue with each other and have their disagreements, they didn’t appear to hate each other. “Those two need to be better at communicating with each other.”

“Speaking of communicating,” Misono said to Kuro. “Did you ask Mahiru why he doesn’t want to be our vocalist? Maybe you should talk to him about it without pushing.”

* * *

The lunch bell rang and Mahiru put away his books into his backpack. His eyes drifted to Kuro who sat a few desks in front of him. He was sleeping at his desk with his hood over his head. They texted each other over the weekend but their conversations had been short. He wanted to talk with him more but he was afraid he would become awkward if their conversation drifted to the topic of music.

Mahiru had planned to wait to see whether Kuro would go to talk with him again but it appeared that he would spend his lunch sleeping at his desk. Kuro had complimented his voice and asked him to be the singer of his band. His words made Mahiru’s heart flutter and tighten at the same time. He was happy that Kuro liked his singing yet he always felt sad when someone asked him to sing. He couldn’t have known the effect his request would have and Mahiru didn’t want to lose their new friendship over the question.

Mahiru took a deep breath before he crossed the room to Kuro’s desk. He lightly tapped on his shoulder to wake him and he groaned in response. The yawn he made sounded like a grumpy cat and laughter escaped Mahiru. His voice woke Kuro and he turned his head from where it was hidden in his arm. He was surprised to find Mahiru kneeling next to his desk.

“You shouldn’t be sleeping in class, Kuro. The teacher has given up on waking you up every few minutes but that’s not a good thing.” Mahiru lectured him and leaned against his desk. “During lunch, my friends on the soccer team will be running around the track to improve their endurance during lunch. He invited me to join him and hang out. I was hoping you’ll come with me. You slept for a good hour so you must have a lot of energy.”

Kuro hadn’t expected him to invite him to spend time with him outside of the staircase. He would only ask him to teach him how to play the guitar. Even though he didn’t like sports or exercise, Kuro nodded and stood from his desk. His silent answer made Mahiru’s face beam with a smile. The moment he put on his guitar case and stood next to him, he took Kuro’s hand and pulled him out of the classroom.

“I’m glad that you agreed so quickly, Kuro. I thought I would have to bribe you into exercising with food or something. Since I always pack too much food for myself, I’ll still share some with you. I like to cook but I rarely have a chance to share it with someone.” Mahiru led him down the hall. “Do you want to race to see who’s faster?”

“We both know that you’ll win. Please, don’t make this poor kitty run, Mahiru. I would rather just walk around the track with you anyways.” He said casually but Mahiru’s eyes widened slightly. Then, his expression softened and he nodded with a laugh. “After I spend the lunch period running, I’ll sleep through the rest of school. I hope you’re ready to take responsibility for that.”

“I don’t mind if it’s you.” He knew that Kuro was only joking with him so he flirted back. Mahiru doubted he had expected him to do so from the blush that rose onto Kuro’s neck. He chuckled lightly and then walked to the doors leading outside.

They walked outside and Mahiru enjoyed the cool breeze. He liked spending time with him in the staircase but going outside was a fun change of pace. He spotted his friend on the track field and he waved to him. Kuro saw the amount of people on the field and he hesitated slightly. Even though he was accustomed to crowds when his bands played at venues, he wasn’t the best with people.

Mahiru noticed how Kuro’s steps slowed slightly and looked up at him. He took his large hand into his and squeezed it lightly. He could feel the calluses on his fingers. “Mafuyu and the others are really nice and I’m sure you’ll get along with them. Don’t worry about feeling awkward. You don’t have any trouble talking with me so focus on that.”

“I wasn’t afraid of talking with people but the running. The track field is bigger than I thought it would be.” He said and shrugged. Mahiru’s reassurance made him feel more comfortable. He had a lot of fun simple talking with him and his presence could make running the track bearable. Kuro wondered how his siblings would react if they saw him with the soccer team.

They crossed the school yard together and Mahiru introduced him to his friends. Kuro put down his bag on the ground and leaned his guitar case against it so people wouldn’t step on it accidentally. He expected Mahiru to place his own guitar in the pile of bags. Instead, he walked onto the track and motioned for him to run with him. The guitar wasn’t heavy but it would be tiring to carry it everywhere.

He could guess that Mahiru had his reasons to keep the guitar so close to him. He didn’t want to push him by asking him why. Kuro joined him on the track field and they began to run side by side. The guitar on his back would make the jog difficult so he matched his pace with Mahiru’s. The soccer team quickly passed them and a gap formed between them.

“I’m really happy that you came with me today.” Mahiru told Kuro and smiled up at him. “For a minute, I was worried that you wouldn’t. Your band needs a singer but I said no to your invitation. You even offered to teach me how to play the guitar in exchange. I don’t think I’ll be the right person for your band though Can we still be friends? We can hang out on the track field like this.”

“I’m not upset that you said no.” He said and Mahiru let out a breath of relief. “But I don’t know if I can survive running around the track every day. Maybe we can do something more relaxing instead. I’ll teach you how to play your guitar after school. That’s less troublesome than running.”

Mahiru stopped and frowned at him. “I said I didn’t want to be a singer.”

“I don’t mind. I’ll still teach you. Playing the guitar is important to you and that’s something a friend should support.” Kuro faced him and said, “You can pay me for the lesson with food. You’re always talking about how you’re a good cook and I’m a little curious.”

He was almost knocked off his feet when Mahiru threw his arms around his neck. Kuro wrapped his arms around his waist and he managed to keep them from falling to the ground. He looked down at Mahiru and their eyes met. His brown eyes were overflowing with happiness and he never thought a sight could make his heart race. They were so close and he worried he would be able to hear his heartbeat. Mahiru cupped his face and smiled. “Thank you, Kuro.”

* * *

Kuro and Mahiru would meet in the staircase to play their guitars. He had told him that he wanted to play a particular song so he taught him how to read music sheets. The song he wanted to play didn’t have music sheets for him to reference but it helped structure the song in his head. Over the past few days, he learned so much from Kuro.

Mahiru sat on a park bench and waited for Kuro to arrive. Since it was Friday and he needed to practise with his band after school, they agreed to meet in the nearby park around eight. There were a few minutes before he should arrive so he decided to practise the chords he showed him the previous day. He took out the notes Kuro had made for him.

Kuro gave him a notebook filled with drawings of the finger position to play each note. The notebook also held other advice to help him practise while he was home. Mahiru could tell that the notebook was new and the pages warmed his heart. He acted reluctant to teach him but it was clear he cared from the effort he put into the notebook.

“Sorry, I’m late.” He heard Kuro’s voice across the park and he looked up to see him. He was out of breath when he collapsed onto the bench next to him. “I agreed to teach you how to play the guitar so I could avoid exercising but I ended up running a mile anyways. Can’t deal. Our rehearsal ended up longer than usual because Tetsu broke his guitar stick. That kid is too strong.”

“I can picture something like that.” Mahiru laughed at the image. He considered waiting at the music shop but he didn’t want to distract the band while they practised. He handed a water bottle to Kuro and said, “You didn’t need to run. I wasn’t waiting here for long. Do you think we should go to the music shop to practise? It looks like the sun will be setting sooner than usual.”

Kuro tilted his head back to the side where the sun was slowly descending from the sky. “We should have an hour before it gets too dark to play. I showed you a few chords yesterday. When I started teaching myself how to play the guitar, I just memorized the chords and went from there. I don’t know if you’ll be the same as me though. Are there any that you’re having trouble with any of them?”

“The drawings you gave me have been helpful but I’m having trouble with his one chord. My hands feel uncomfortable when I play it and it doesn’t sound right.” Mahiru adjusted his position on the park bench so he was facing Kuro. He placed his fingers on the strings where he had marked in the notebook and strummed the guitar. “It sounds flat, doesn’t it?”

“Don’t place your finger directly on the fret but behind it a little. You’ll probably be more comfortable if you use your ring finger and middle finger here instead. Hold still.” He slowly moved his fingers into the correct position. Kuro noticed how small and soft his hands were. Without thinking, he stroked his thumb over Mahiru’s fingers. “You haven’t built up any callouses yet so playing will hurt for a while. It’ll eventually get better though. If you start bleeding, I have bandages.”

His fingers were a little swollen from the metal strings but Mahiru didn’t feel the dull pain. His focus was on Kuro’s tender touch running over his fingers. Mahiru noticed that Kuro’s hands were slightly larger than his and he wondered what would happen if he held it. He knew that Kuro was only sitting close to him to help him with his technique but there was a small flutter in his stomach.

“Try playing the chord now and see if it feels better.” His voice pulled Mahiru out of his thoughts and he nodded to hide that he was distracted. He strummed the strings and watched for Kuro’s reaction in the corner of his gaze. He had a subtle smile as he ruffled his brown hair. “That sounds better. Once you feel comfortable with all of the chords, we can work on putting them together to play a song.”

“Will you stop playing with my hair, Kuro?” Mahiru pouted and smoothed his hair back into place.

They returned to playing the guitar and Kuro would give him advice occasionally. He had given him a few lessons over the week and he was surprised by how quickly he had progressed. Kuro sat back and watched Mahiru repeat the same chord. He wasn’t bored because he enjoyed watching the joy in Mahiru’s face as he played.

A string of claps broke through the moment and Kuro turned towards the person. He didn’t recognize the brunette man but there was something familiar about him. The man seemed to know Mahiru though. “I was going to surprise you by coming home early but you’re the one who surprised me. I never thought I would see that guitar again.”

Mahiru nodded and then he hastily placed the guitar back into its case as if he was hiding a secret. “I thought you were out of town with work, Uncle. You should’ve texted me if you were going to come back early. I made plans to eat at a restaurant with Kuro. I would’ve cooked something if I knew we could have a family dinner.”

“It’s okay, Mahiru. I already had dinner with my co-workers so you don’t need to worry about your old man.” He said. Kuro watched the two interact and he reasoned that the man was Mahiru’s uncle. He had told him of how he was adopted. “I know boys probably don’t want to hear something like this but you look just like your mother. You both have the same smile when you play the guitar. I’m glad that I could see it again. Why didn’t you tell me you were learning how to play?”

“I’m sorry, Uncle. I can’t talk about it right now.” Mahiru whispered. Before anyone could react, Mahiru jumped to his feet and dashed away from them. Kuro was confused by the way he suddenly ran away but he immediately ran after him.

* * *

Mahiru ran blindly through the sparse street without a destination in mind. He couldn’t face his uncle after he saw him with the guitar that didn’t belong to him. He was in a desperate haze and he didn’t hear Kuro call his name behind him. The only thing that forced him to stop was his legs giving way under him. He didn’t know how long or far he ran but the weight of emotions made him exhausted.

He thought he would fall forward but then strong arms wrapped around him from behind. Kuro’s embrace kept him from falling. Mahiru turned his face slightly to Kuro but he couldn’t see his expression because his forehead was leaned against his shoulder. He could feel his heavy breathing against his neck. He was afraid that Kuro would judge him for his reaction to his uncle’s innocent question. Others would call him emotional or dramatic for running away.

“Are you okay?” Kuro whispered against his skin and it sent a warm shiver throughout Mahiru. He leaned back against his chest and absentmindedly plucked at his guitar string. He moved out of his arms and turned around. Mahiru’s gaze didn’t leave the ground and Kuro leaned down to see his face better. His lips were pressed into a stiff line and his brown eyes were filled with sorrow. “Mahiru?”

The moment their eyes met, Mahiru faked a smile and said: “I’m sorry I made you run after you said these lessons are to avoid exercising.”

“I complain about running but I don’t really mind a little exercise.” Kuro wanted to lighten the mood with the joke but Mahiru’s expression didn’t change. The smile he wore now didn’t hold the sunlight he came to know. His heart felt uneasy and he wondered when Mahiru’s smile became so important to him. “Did you want to keep our guitar lessons a secret from your uncle?”

Mahiru bit his lip and debated if he should tell Kuro about the reason that he wanted to learn the guitar. They only met recently and his problems could be too burdensome for him. He felt Kuro’s fingers brush through his bangs and he finally looked up at him. Kuro asked, “Is it something you can’t tell me about?”

Mahiru shook his head and told him: “I don’t know how to tell people what I’m feeling. I always worry that my feelings would burden people. No one wants a boy who won’t stop crying. Other people have their own problems and it’ll be easier for everyone if I show people the reaction that they want me to see. Instead of crying, people will be more at ease if I put on a brave smile.”

Even as Mahiru smiled reassuringly to Kuro, his fingers were trembling over his guitar. “It was really sweet of you to invite me to your band but I won’t fit in, Kuro. I should’ve explained my reason the first time you asked me. For a band to succeed, you need to communicate your song’s meaning to the audience. Any song I sing will sound shallow because I’m terrible at expressing my honest feelings.”

Kuro could hear his heart pounding in his ears. He wanted to hold Mahiru in his arms and comfort him but he gripped his jacket at his side to stop himself. At the same time, he thought of their past interactions. The determination he had each time he asked him how to play the guitar. The wonder in his eyes as he listened to his band. The pain Mahiru couldn’t hide whenever he avoided Kuro’s questions about his guitar. Those were Mahiru’s honest feelings yet he belittled himself.

“You can’t express your feelings? How can you say something so stupid while smiling?” Kuro yelled without thinking and surprised them both. He couldn’t stop his thoughts from pouring out. “I could hear your feelings when you sang and it moved me. That’s the reason I invited you to the band!”

More emotions clouded Mahiru’s face: confusion, shock and uncertainty. Lastly, hope softened his eyes and overpowered the past emotions. He parted his lips slightly but the words he wanted to say didn’t leave his mouth. He felt as if there was something gripping his lungs. Kuro touched his neck and Mahiru wondered if he was still able to understand him.

“You don’t have to join the band if singing makes you feel vulnerable.” He patted his head. “We should head back to your park or else your uncle will worry. Do you want to buy a soda on the way? I’ll pay.”

“Kuro,” Mahiru whispered his name. He stepped closer to him until their toes touched and the only thing between them was his guitar. They were so close that he could count Kuro’s long eyelashes. He hadn’t noticed how beautiful his eyes were. He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against his broad chest. In a soft voice, Mahiru began to sing. His song didn’t have any words but Kuro understood it’s meaning.

_I’m a little uncertain but I feel safe with you. I want to try singing with your band, Kuro._


End file.
